


How Neopolitan Stole Christmas!

by HPLovebutt



Category: RWBY
Genre: Anal Sex, Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Christmas Smut, Comedy, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Foursome - F/M/M/M, Hand Jobs, Poetry, Rough Oral Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-11
Updated: 2020-12-11
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:34:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28010982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HPLovebutt/pseuds/HPLovebutt
Summary: Neo attempts a holiday heist so incredibly large in scale, but not all goes as planned in this smutty Christmas tale.
Relationships: Neopolitan/Three Men
Comments: 2
Kudos: 16





	How Neopolitan Stole Christmas!

I’m sure, by now, you’ve heard every Remnant holiday tale

even ‘Rudolph the Red-Nosed Faunus’, and his exploits in Vale.

But this, my friend, is a tale unlike any you’ve ever heard

although I should warn you, it is rather absurd.

It all began one snowy Christmas Eve

in Menagerie, of all places, should you choose to believe

that winter could arrive there, despite it’s usual sand and sun.

Regardless, it was beneath a peaceful snowfall that the Faunus were having fun.

All through the winter season, it was easy to hear

the town of Kuo Kuana come alive with holiday cheer.

But now it was quiet on this cold winter’s night,

No one was awake, and they had turned out every light.

For tomorrow was Christmas, then the festivities could begin.

There was to be a grand holiday festival, and anyone could join in!

A more merry time the Faunus there could not recall,

for you see, of all the holidays, everyone who lived there loved Christmas most of all!

Well, almost everyone. All through the town, the Faunus liked Christmas a lot,

but high on the hill, Neopolitan…did not.

The sly young woman finally finished her prep work

and looked down upon Kuo Kuana with a devious smirk.

All of the Faunus would sleep soundly tonight without a care in their heads

even as she planned to put this silly yuletide tradition to bed.

For you see, she was planning a heist so grand,

it had not been attempted by any thief in the land.

Yes, this year Christmas would not come to Menagerie

for Neo would steal it all and end all the camaraderie.

She snatched up some bags, and some threadbare sacks

as she tapped her umbrella against the ground with a clack.

They were all she would need to accomplish this job

and leave all the Faunus with nothing but sobs.

Down the hill she skipped, with a spring in her step,

twirling her umbrella and brimming with pep.

By the end of the night, it would be done,

she would steal all their presents and end all their fun.

Christmas would be hers, she was ready to take it all:

Kuo Kuana was about to be visited by a thief two sizes too small.

Once upon the town, she started her job

Stealing and snatching with the occasional rob.

All the decorations and each and every gift,

they were no match for a thief so swift.

No sound was left beneath her lithe little feet

as she stole all the lights, and swiped every treat.

Breaking into their homes was easy to someone like herself,

and she grinned as she looted every cupboard and shelf.

All of her prizes swiftly fell into a bag

until each one bulged so much they began to sag.

But there was no time to surrender,

not when there was one place she had yet to plunder.

The manor of the Belladonnas was her next destination

as she smiled and sneered with devious determination.

No holiday heist would be complete

without sweeping a Christmas tree off it’s feet,

and rumor had it that the Belladonna’s tree simply couldn’t be beat,

so she leapt onto their balcony in search of her treat.

Her fingers were nimble, her fingers were quick,

even more so with a sturdy lockpick.

The window creaked open, and in Neo crept,

as Kali and Ghira peacefully slept.

In the living room stood her final prize,

and little Neo could hardly believe her eyes.

The rumors were true, the murmurs were right:

no Christmas tree in the world could compare to this sight.

But this was a job, a mission, a crime:

if she gawked all night she wouldn’t make it in time.

Same as everything else, same as all the rest,

the tree went down by Neo, that pest!

Rolled up in a blanket and stuffed in a sack,

the tree was now hers, hoisted up onto her back.

The gifts beneath were no exception, and with a grin most unpleasant,

Neo quickly snatched up each and every present.

Dust crystals, new scrolls, and rare boxes of tea:

they all went into her bags with a fiendish glee.

Once the place was cleaned out, she gave it one last look

before leaping up the chimney like a yuletide crook.

Out from the rooftop she landed without making a sound.

Neo couldn’t help but smile: there was no one around.

She had finally done it on this cold Christmas Eve,

but now all that was left was to silently leave.

She took one step, then another, as quick as she could,

until her foot suddenly came down on a loose piece of wood.

A terrible creak rose up through the night,

and gave the little thief an incredible fright.

Someone must have heard, they would be on their way:

there was no time to lose, she just couldn’t stay!

Neo flew from the rooftop, quick as a flash,

carefully minding her ill-gotten stash.

She bounded across each roof and arose such a clatter,

until she finally leapt down without using a ladder.

Into an old alley she landed and rolled,

before ducking into an abandoned house to escape the cold.

The little thief Neo dropped her bags and decided to stop

and listen for the sounds of a huntsman or a cop.

When no one came running, she relaxed a tiny bit:

for a moment, she had feared, this job almost went to shi-

“Don’t try anything, miss. Just stay right there.”

The commanding voice appeared right out of thin air.

Neo turned and looked to see just what was the matter.

Three tough huntsmen had suddenly surrounded her.

Each brandished a weapon and slowly closed in

as Neo realized there was no way to win.

These men were not interested in hearing her talk,

but there was no way out, no escape route she could walk.

It was then, just before all was said and done,

that little Neo had an idea that sounded like fun.

Yes, the huntsmen were trying to seize all her loot,

but she couldn’t help it: they were all kind of cute.

Each one, in their own special ways,

had something or other that attracted her gaze.

So instead, little Neo, the thief of great renown,

decided right then to take them all on sleigh ride to poundtown.

“Just drop those bags and come over to us.”

said the one in front. “There’s no need for anymore trouble or fuss.”

Down went her loot, and with a swing in her hips,

she sauntered over to him and laid her eyes on his lips.

In a flash, her umbrella handle was hooked behind his head,

so she could pull him down to her instead.

The huntsman almost panicked, he thought something was amiss,

until the little thief grinned and gave him a kiss.

Time seemed to stop as their lips warmly met,

and the rest of them didn’t know what to do quite yet.

Once she broke away, that lovely little crook

gave the cute huntsman a most sultry look.

His bravado was gone, and his confidence was shaken,

but if this was going to happen, he didn’t want to be mistaken.

All it took was a nod of her head to show she agreed,

and he seized her cheeks with a burning need.

They kissed again, this time with more force,

as the two of them let their passions run their course.

His eager hands felt up her body she had intentionally flaunted,

but now it didn’t matter: she had him right where she wanted.

She let him think he was in control, that he was setting the pace,

until a most surprised look suddenly crossed his face.

Neo’s hand had slipped beneath his pants, and she went straight to work

after seizing his cock and giving it a quick jerk.

She began to stroke him, and he didn’t know what to say,

but the bulge in his pants grew three sizes that day.

Neo turned to the other two with a playful grin,

and beckoned them both to come join in.

Their hands were everywhere, crisscrossing like rope,

each one only stopping for a squeeze or a grope.

A rub between her legs or a light slap on her ass,

they eagerly felt up the slight thieving lass.

She tended to each one, with a passionate kiss and a stroke

as she was spun around between them like a wheel on a spoke

So many hands roughly pulled off her clothes and tossed them away,

but Neo just smiled: now it was time to play.

She let them rub against her pussy, let them play with her chest

until they were rock-hard and ready: the way Neo liked them best.

The naked little thief sank down onto her knees

with a look in her eyes that said she aimed to please.

She tore down his pants, and pulled his rigid cock free

before she wrapped her lips around it with a sinuous glee.

He gasped as her head sunk right down to his base

as her tongue flicked against his hardness with a quickening pace.

The other two dropped their pants and moved within her reach,

so she could jerk off their cocks too, one hand for each.

Once she tasted all three and grew desperate for more,

she grinned and pulled one of huntsman down onto the floor.

With a playful wink and a twist of her hips,

she mounted him swiftly without taking the cock from her lips.

She pressed his dick against her glistening pussy, only just the tip did she tease

before she sunk right down onto his cock with ease.

The huntsman gasped: she was so tight, and so wet,

He felt so amazing and she hadn’t even moved yet.

It was then that Neo, with a burning thirst,

started to ride the second man as she sucked off the first.

A grunt from behind her said the third one wanted in,

so she leaned herself forward with a devious grin.

She thrust out her backside, so pert and so cute,

and invited the third man to come follow suit.

He knelt behind Neo, and the little thief almost gasped

as the full length of his hardness slid into her perfectly tight ass.

She was now entirely full, and they began to move as one.

Her heart pounded in her chest as they began their fun.

The man in front grabbed her hair and thrust his hips, to fuck her mouth even better.

But being so roughly handled like this just made Neo wetter.

As she rode the man on the floor, he pressed his thumb to her clit,

and sent little Neo into a shivering fit.

That huntsman was generous, but the third one acted more gruffly.

He squeezed her tits hungrily as he fucked her ass so roughly.

The heat in her body thrilled her right to her soul

and burned her deliciously as she was fucked in every hole.

She tried as hard as she could to not give in right there,

as ending this moment too soon simply wouldn’t be fair.

So she moved even harder, to make their jingle bells rock

as she bounced up and down on top of a cock.

To be filled up with so much throbbing, rigid heat

straightened her back with a shiver and curled the toes on her feet.

The racing of her heart, and the thrill up her spine

made Neo realize it was almost time.

Her whole body tensed and she began to shake

as it became clear this was all she could take.

The edge of her vision whitened, and stars were all she could see

as Neo finally climaxed against these hard cocks three.

Stars bloomed around her eyes as she finally let go

as bliss spread through her body and threatened to overflow

Just then, through the huntsman came a most wonderful force

no doubt spurred on by Neo’s orgasm, of course.

It left each of them shivering as they too approached the end

for against this incredible feeling, they could not defend.

The first one gasped and increased the thrusts of his hips

As Neo sucked even harder, and tightened her lips.

Finally, when he could take no more pressure,

he cried out as he came, and shot out his pleasure

across her face and mouth, and against her lustful smile

until he was left spent and breathless before sitting down for a while.

The second one grunted, and gripped her soft thighs

as heat burned up through him, and he shut his eyes.

Neo grinned wickedly and moved faster, eager for him to explode.

It wasn’t long until he was groaning and gasping to let out his load.

His cock pulsed and trembled with each passionate shot

as he emptied himself up her stomach with each spurt so hot.

Now exhausted and spent, his cock fell against his lap

and he rolled out from under her, now ready for a long winter’s nap.

The only one left was the huntsman from behind

And getting him off was now the only thing on her mind.

She got down on all fours as he gripped her by her hair

To pull her up into an arch with her lovely tits in the air.

His breathing was rough as he tried to hang on, but alas,

the poor huntsman simply couldn’t resist Neo’s incredible ass.

He slid out his cock and cried out with passion

as he climaxed across her lower back with wild abandon

Each time she felt his heat splash against her, she smirked:

her plan was flawless, and every part of it had worked.

The huntsmen were now all too tired and sprawled about the place

to bother to arrest her or even give chase.

Yes, this was Neo’s plan, the last of her schemes,

but honestly, it worked even better than in her wildest dreams.

While her plan had succeeded beyond her expectations and then some,

she couldn’t leave just yet: she was still covered in cum!

Her body was covered and literally dripping with lust,

so she grabbed a cloth to wipe up her face and her bust.

It didn’t take long to clean up the rest, and she was done in no time flat

before she pulled on her clothes, and her beloved bowler hat.

Just before she left, Neo looked out and hardly believed her eyes.

Over the hill, the new morning sun was beginning it’s rise

It would seem that little Neo, in all of her fun,

forgot that she needed to be gone before the first light of the sun.

Now there was simply no time to haul all her precious loot away!

This wasn’t fair! Now some of it would have to stay!

She snatched up the smallest bag, and took off with a sneer

and left the rest behind with the huntsmen, even when her victory was so near.

Out of town and up the the snowy hill did little Neo dash,

right back to her safehouse, and slammed the door shut with a crash.

It was all gone! Her loot had to stay!

Now the Faunus would still have their beloved Christmas Day!

There was nothing to show for it, this heist was a waste!

She wanted to starve them of the holidays, but they would still get the full taste!

Our despondent thief Neo fell into a chair,

and out of frustration, gave her a loot a thoughtful stare.

She gazed at her meager spoils, with eyes brown and pink,

and put a finger to her chin as she began to think.

Sure, not all went as planned, and she hadn’t succeeded,

but…did it really matter, what she had or what she needed?

A smile formed as she thought of her night

and of her fun with the huntsmen who filled her so tight.

Out of her bag she pulled an ornament, so shiny and rosy

and hung it up in her safehouse, and it made the place seem…cozy.

Maybe, Neo thought as she began to feel glad

This whole Christmas thing really wasn’t that bad.

She pulled out more ornaments and lights, intent on decoration

and decked the halls of her hideout with a newfound jubilation.

What fun did she have with her lights to hang and her gifts to unwrap

Yes, they weren’t _hers_ since she stole them, but who gives a crap?

Christmas isn’t about the presents, or even the tree:

It’s about celebrating in whichever way fills you with glee.

The Faunus would have their special Christmas Day with nothing to fear,

but Neopolitan grinned: there was always next year.

**Author's Note:**

> First of all, I would like to take this time to formally apologize to Dr. Seuss…
> 
> Secondly, thanks for reading! This was born from an idea I had when I was writing my other holiday special (which you should also check out! It’s got Ruby and Weiss and it doesn’t rhyme this time I swear). I kept having the urge to make things rhyme, almost like the night before Christmas. It felt kind of awkward to just leave it in, but I wrote them down anyway and kept them aside. Once I had enough, I had the crazy, stupid idea to write a smutty Christmas poem about Neo in the vein of the Grinch instead. It still wasn't working if only some of it rhymed, so then I thought: 'Well, what if the whole thing rhymed and it was written like the original poem?' From there, it just kind of got out of control. Still, it ended up being a ton of fun to write, so I hope you got a laugh out of it.
> 
> Whether or not this worked is up to you, but let me know what you thought with a comment if you want. Thanks again for reading, have a great day, and a wonderfully happy holiday!


End file.
